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[8. 25. 09 // @ 2 : 19 am] |
i can honestly say i am an idiot. so fickle. so very very fickle. little things changing my mind you know, to the extreme. i just wanna be somewhere nice. somewhere that warms the soul like a long day in the sun. gets you sleepin good and long.
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[7. 16. 09 // @ 2 : 14 am] |
so very sweet, but what was it that you said...
oh.
"if that's the case then leave me out of it"
and with a little time i'm left thinking
don't act like you've never hurt anyone
and by anyone i mean anyone
me even
you're the one who started kissin me on the porch...
it had been so long, but you didn't even ask questions.
i am fucking bored.
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[5. 11. 09 // @ 6 : 32 pm] |
i will try to make it a point to write every day. lack of school makes me feel brain dead. in dire need of a good book. so i can get out without really getting out. so i can put it down and everything with be back to normal though i can honestly say i don't want to be here right now. all alone in a city i hardly know. stuck on repeat. i talk to people i just met, but i'm never intrigued. i talk because i guess that's what you're supposed to do...but it's all petty conversation. irritated by the fact that everybody expects something from everybody. i talk to a guy and i know what he wants. what i really need is someone who can make me think. think things i've never thought. went to a show to see some old friends and i'm glad for that 'cause i smiled real smiles and caught a glimpse of my old self, but only a glimpse and sadly enough it was gone by morning.
i don't like the half of you, but i'm still so attached.
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[4. 26. 09 // @ 9 : 26 am] |
because being without you is just as unbearable as being with you. sure, i'm okay. sure. i will be at least. i just don't understand. never have. i pull the same advice i did from my 7th grade algebra teacher, "don't ask why. it just is."
love is a mathematical emotion. i am so tired of change. it never gives me any time to catch up.
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[4. 16. 09 // @ 1 : 16 am] |
my apartment is a mess. cleaning is a waste of time. i haven't had much to say in a long while...the negative effects of marijuana. at least for me. i don't think the way i used to. nothing to me is pretty anymore.
edit//
i posted this without even reading over my previous entry. i guess nothing has changed these past few months.
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